OH MY GOD

oh my god
I dont understand the blog skin thing
celebrated many people's birthday
Lydia
Weijie
CHeryl coming
mine melody his.... LOL
SO many

WAtch UP!!

SO CUTE THE DOG dog cone of shame !!!
SHould get one for some people

Hmm

Oh well since i back better try and blog

I have been wondering alot recently ..
about everything

Anyways have been prawning nearly every week new fav past time
SO afraid that i will miss it when i get back to the UK :(

Oniomania

Oh ma god.... I am trying to stop shopping help .......
I dont know wats wrong with me with buy buy buy...
I dont know seriously.... I still want to buy haha

I was in class today and someone unfortunately from a family with a Pol. background
said this
Gay people make bad parents
I was quiet the whole time trying to hear everyone's comments
To my surprise.

A very chauvinist guy my friend nice guy he asked me about such stuff..
I explained and i think even without me explaining, he himself feels that
PLU are born like that .
And the one making the most noise i dont know rich? or just plain one sided
I dont get the drift.... Int. Relations? doesnt make sense. People dont live in one country
yes its her opinion but not listening is another.... and the worst part when you dont listen
PEOPLE dont listen to what you are saying either
this conversation was carried out as though i did not appear to be there...

Yes and unfortunately, she was part of a religious community... i need deliverance?
She said it... well
i start to ponder on the religion aspect...do people join the religion as they have no where else to turn to?
for hope?
I think hope has to be in built not instilled upon us... you have to have the own feeling you want to hope for something..
i was quite shocked at how people can be sooo hard headed..
Well personally on a daily observation - not very bright, nice person
But what is wrong is that ....

is she saying in front of me that i wont be a good parent?
I want to have a family of my own in the future..
I look at things differently... Life sucks.. but i have to look at it .. what comes my way did...
I dont agree with one of my lecturer he said something about life
but if you keep thinking htat maybe if you didnt maybe if you didnt, i dont think he has actually embraced totally.
Yes he is older people who have seen more like to brag they have seen more...
That dosent mean i havent seen anything in my life.

I do miss V. I know till now that he is my soulmate..
Even more so after moving across the globe...
There is never a new start in life .. NEVER EVER
Just a new change and continuity..
I dont know what else i can do with him now.

But i think if we were parents,
our children will be good kids.
Even if they do have a crime gene or watever,,, they are still good people just misguided or not being able to help themselves.
Children under gay people doesnt make them gay...
People without religion doesnt make them bad people
I know what i want and the extend that i want in my life...
My future career especially... If i have children...
I know the extent i can go.. into how much or how is the best i can provide and do.
No different from any other parents that love their children
PLU's have seen so much as well
we have seen discrimination, prejudice, felt shame, felt sadness , courage with coming out,
We have lots to teach as well.
But a person's sexuality can never be taught and i dont think any parents have purposely ever tried to
POINT OUT TO a child that a woman/man is the correct form to copulate..
In everyone's younger days they develop their own interest...even without their parents interfering...

GOD I NEED SHOPPING!

Seriously?

Seriously?
Is this happening to me?
i think we all need bigger hearts.
I may or may not have.
I quarrel for what i believe in
isnt that the whole point
i dont want to end up like what some people want
i want WHAT I WANT godamit

SLeepless

Oh my i have a problem with sleeping...
I dont know whats the issues on me mind.

Hmmm but i do realize something
maybe its cos i grew up watching her
Well the The Nanny is somewhat like me

Forever trying to be young she is FOREVER 29 haha (I am forever 18)
A good moralist... thinks everything should be in a certain moral way but not forceful.
Likes to talk
Likes to joke
Loves trouble
Do things the complicated way
Likes to HAHAHAHA (NASAL/weird voice of mine)
Loves funny people
Sarcastic-Charm
An individual in style
Bold colours

Well

Here comes the scary part
Would i be broken up with those crushing scenes
But she had style she had class, thats how she became the NANNY~~~

and unitl i am 29 (31)
mmmmmmmm
Scary
i start to wonder isit because i dont have that Attraction Mode Built in people
Just friendly be yourself
which becomes the better of us.. miss many chances...but many friends...

My good friend was down and told me i would have people that are true to me around me.
Maybe so in good faith, its scary, but i do hope my Mr Sheffield Comes along be it 5 years of Drama/Sitcom for a happily ever after.
I dont need a fairy tale But i need a life
Filled with Fun Laughter and i seriously dont mind three kids thats werent mine naturally.:)

Hell No

Oh ma God what the hell is happening to me !
I am such an idiot ...
Gordon Brown had to come out and ma mind reach to the other realm or something
during the exam....

I am still not studying for my last paper and here typing on my comp...
Something is wrong with me.. Even if i face my fears.... I dont think it
can be solved in like one day
I think the only consolation i can give myself is that i might not be where all the people are going to be
I dont know if its sad or happy?

i am young or am i not?
people say i am young because they are not like us bananas
WE know when we are feeling older
IF i get thrown back to singapore I CAN SEE MYSELF JUMP 2 numbers up....

ARH this is crazy i need to start reading consideration/misrepresentation.
otherwise i WILL HAVE LOST ALL MY CONSIDERATION AND be misrepresented!
SEE I GOT THIS Ya'll :~(

Here i am

Here i am trying to study...
I made another mistake again... WOW... Life in ma face...
There is no point ranting here.

i am still in the library trying to figure out Gordon Brown @ 05 32...
God still need to let my tutor check before i take the exams.... HeLP!!!
I seriously couldnt concentrate at all
and my exams are on friday!!!

I think about wat could have been the happier everytime
Maybe i was always positive
i use to remember mel say why i think everyone is okay/nice
but than as time goes by i get dissapointed and dejected and tada thats why i feel sad
cos maybe it was innately i enjoyed everyone (except some incorrigible people)
therefore i feel more and more negative.....

MY friend told me to "BELIEVE". Does it work?
I dont know sometimes the harder i hope it doesnt appear but i dont get the harder you fall.
Cos i personally believe that when you have gone through something bad no materr how bad the next one is, it doesnt matter. Maybe.

My mind starts wondering to have i forgotten the past.? have they drifted off?
V still keeps poping in my mind.
Maybe we shared alittle more than anyone else in the world ever could and ever will.

F doesnt.
W just the name.

I suddenly do not know what the hell i must do in terms of me life.
I need revelation.... I need to sit under a tree and think but i still want to be with someone after enlightenment
NOT a Vegan....
I want people to be happy than i will be happy
Thats how i am I AM influenced by me surroundings
and the leffect lasts thats why i want people to have fun around me.
Au secours!!!!!!